Thankfulness

I always think it is a great idea to reflect on the many blessings we have, especially during the month of November. However, I can NEVER remember to post something everyday. So, this year I decided to start November off right. Thanking God for all he has given to me. Here are my first 15 "days" of Thankfulness (all in one day) and maybe hopefully sometime before the end of the month I will remember to post the last 15.

1. Jesus Christ. There is no greater sacrifice and no greater love.
"This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.  Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." 1 John 4:9-11

2. Kevin Hatchell. His selfless love, his compassion, his devotion to our babies, his desire to know God deeper, his competitive spirit, his ability to grow a beard in 2 days, the list goes on and on.

3. Three little boys who call me "momma." So incredibly grateful that God chose Kevin and I to be their parents. There is no earthly joy better than what these babies bring into our lives.

 

4. Ruby Kate. Preparing for our daughter's arrival has brought us so much joy!

5. My daddy. A man who is willing to drop everything to help me.  No matter the time or circumstance, I know I can count on him.

6. Aunts who spoil me rotten and treat me like their daughter.

 

7. CBS (Community Bible Study) It wasn't my plan to be free on Wednesday mornings, God had other ideas. Boy, am I glad He knows better than I do what I need. Because I certainly needed CBS and the encouragement I have found there.

 

8. Friends that count as family. Those people that make my life easier and happier just by being there.

 

9. Chick-fi-la tea. No explanation needed.

 

10. Generous people who have given to us without being asked.

 

11. My iphone. After using my old school, sliding keyboard, the  #9 doesn't work, cell phone for years, it was such a wonderful surprise to get an iphone.

 

12. McCann's blanket = instant comfort to our almost 2 yr old.

 

13. Bedtime. I have never been so tired as I have been the last 5 months. Baby girl must be taking all my energy.

 

14. Dec. 10th. Christmas break begins for Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary. Whoo hoo!

 

15. Our house is off the market = No crazy cleaning



 

Sale or Sell? Pregnancy makes spelling harder than it should be.

"Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need."
                                                                                                                             -Sarah Ban Breathnach

Our house is still for sale. It hasn't shown much over the last few weeks. We have learned that things are totally unpredictable when it comes to selling houses. You never know what influences interested buyers or which weeks it might show 3 times (or none at all).  I am a planner and I like to know what is going to happen next. My husband calls it "being controlling." Either way, it is an extremely difficult process for someone like me. The frantic cleaning, the constant need to reorganize, and the wide array of emotions that I experience every time I see our realtor's number on my phone all make this hard for me. I immediately get excited at the thought that this might be "the one." The excitement fades and it is replaced with unshakeable sense of nostalgia.

For all practical purposes, it would be best for us to sell this house. As we prepare for the new baby's arrival, we will be moving McCann into Manning and Myers' room. Things are going to be tight. Our table will hold exactly 6 and our kitchen is maxed out. (If you come to our house for dinner, plan to sit at a card table.) I am not complaining, merely being realistic.  We have added onto the house twice already to fit our growing family. Without making the layout awkward, there is no feasible way to expand anymore. In my frustration over lack of space and an overabundance of stuff, it is easy for me to be enthusiastic about the prospect of moving on.

Then there is the other side of it all.  The part of me that clings to the familiar. The part that doesn't see the limited space, but the memories we have made here. (Insert sappy Hallmark card) Seriously,  our family's history is right here in these walls. Kevin and I shared our first kiss in this living room on Tuesday, Oct 5th, nine years ago. He told me he loved me just 3 days later in the exact same place and 52 days after that he proposed, you guessed it....... right here.

During the year after we got married, this house became my safe haven. It was no longer Kevin's house, it was home. I spent most of my waking hours, outside of work, with momma in the house that I was raised in. Momma and Daddy built that house when I was five and I have very few memories before we lived there. I love that house and I am so glad my daddy has chosen to stay there. But it is no longer home.

Fast forward one more year, I can envision myself flinging the front door open, bounding down the steps, meeting Kevin on the walkway, pregnancy test in hand. Two pink lines. We were going to have our very first baby. I will never forget that moment. Or the one that followed 8 or so months later when we brought Manning home. We gently sat the brand new carrier with the brand new blanket, covering our brand new baby in the middle of the living room. What do we do now? Boy, we had a lot to learn and we have...... right here in this house.

We have had 3 more positive pregnancy tests since then. We have brought home 2 more precious boys (though not in a new carrier!) It's difficult to imagine bringing our 4th child home anywhere else.

As with everything, it's all in God's perfect timing. As much as I would love to know the "whens" of this entire process, I trust that God knows exactly what He is doing. When our house sells (or doesn't) I want to have perfect peace that it was all a part of His bigger plan.


I used to dream about escaping my ordinary life, but my life was never ordinary. I had simply failed to notice how extraordinary it was. Likewise, I never imagined that home might be something I would miss.” 
                                                                                                                                          -Ransom Riggs

I hear it all time. My boys look just like Kevin. I agree...mostly. Manning and McCann (esp. McCann) do really favor their daddy. They have his bright blue eyes, tiny noses, and full lips. Then there is Myers. He is such a cute kid, but with his green eyes, wider (like his momma's) nose, and thinner lips....he does not look as much like his daddy as the other two mini-Kevin's. I like to take credit for Myers' looks. I mean of the three - he is the only one who slightly favors me. (Maybe #4 will come out looking just like me. Yeah, right. Kevin obviously has some strong genes.)

But it's actually not me that my precious middle boy favors. Check this out.

 

The little boy in the pictures.....my Daddy! Myers looks just like him! Dad was around 4 in these pictures and it amazes me how similar they look!

Red Lipstick

 

 

My momma always wore her make-up. She was an "eye-liner and bright lipstick" kinda lady. I used to tease with her, telling her she put on her face to check the mail. In fact, Dr. Pavy and his staff (her oncologist) routinely commented that, "If Mrs. Ruby didn't have her make-up on, she was REALLY feeling bad." Stage 4 cancer will do that. However, even in the last few weeks of her life, I remember watching her apply that famous eyeliner with her shaking hand and skeleton thin arm. It probably seemed ridiculous to some, but it was important to her. And it gave me comfort. I was losing her day by day, but seeing her worry with her make-up gave me a familiar glimpse of the woman she used to be.....Back when she wasn't sick and cancer seemed like a foreign concept.... Before we knew first-hand the ravaging effects of chemo and radiation. 

 

When mom was alive, digital cameras were not the norm. We took an entire roll of film, got the whole thing developed, and were forced to deal with any "unkind" pictures of ourselves. Where was the delete button? Ten years ago, we were forced to have paper copies of our double chins, bad hair, and closed eyes. Well, either mom did a fabulous job throwing out every "unprepared" picture of herself or she really was remarkable at her make-up regimen. (Like I remember.) I searched through hundreds of pictures today and found very few of momma without her signature bright lips and lined eyes.

 

In so many ways, I am turning into my mother. With every year that passes, I look and sound more her. Growing up, I promised myself that I would wear make-up like her when I was an "adult.". 31 years and 3.5 kids later, I probably qualify. I am avoiding sunburns, fighting wrinkles, and coloring gray hairs. I didn't get mom's olive, thick, skin (Thanks, dad) and already have more lines on my face than she did when she died at age 51. It's time to face the music. It's time break out the red lipstick.

So if you see me looking like I belong in the circus (or the side show), just smile and know that I living up to a legacy...... and I have some big shoes to fill.

 

 

Boogers and Bananas

Boogers or Bananas. That's what Kevin thinks I should rename my blog. Smallest boy loves bananas. Seriously, he can eat muliple bananas everyday and he goes nuts everytime we pass them in the grocery store. So, at least once a day Kevin or I ask, "What's that on the baby's face?" The response is always the same. "It's either boogers or bananas."

We spent last week at the beach. 8 days of bliss. It was the best vacation ever. Seriously, it was absolutely perfect weather, the boys played outside all day everyday, and we had sweet friends to hang out with all week. Of course, with three little boys under five there is chaos. Always. We find calm in that chaos though. It is our norm. One day we went on the beach late in the evening. There were only a handful of other people out. As we walked  I was overwhelmed with the blessing of my family. This man, God gave me, is my rock and these sons of ours bring us joy every single day. They are my biggest ministry. My personal mission is to teach my children the love of Christ and the power of the cross. There are so many things that need my attention. So many things that demand my time and energy. However, no matter what gets left by the wayside or dropped off my too full plate- teaching them about Jesus' love for them will come first. Though I try my best to be exactly what God has called me to be for my boys.  I fail everyday. I get caught up in the meaningless, trivial, yet time-consuming things in our world.  God forgives me and He teaches me that even in my weakness He can be glorified. It is amazing how often the Lord uses my little men to show me his love and power.

Myers was a quiet 1 year old. He never said much and when he did it was only a few words. This shocked us especially coming after motormouth  Manning. As a baby and toddler, Myers was always more reserved, more cautious, more wary of strangers. Then, he turned two. The gate was opened and we have not had a moment of silence in the last year. He is the most talkative kid EVER. It is non-stop questions. "Momma, why you doing that?" "How you going to do it?" "Momma, how come you did it that way?" It's endless. I find it endearing and comical. God makes us mommas especially immune to nuisances of our own children.
His favorite place to ask questions is in the car. Usually I can respond right away and we can move on. However, the other day, the interrogation started and I was trying to pull into a gas station. Manuevering between traffic in the Wal-mart parking lot is not the time to be put in the hot seat. So I failed. I did not answer him in a timely manner. I was concentrating and just could not focus on his relentless questions. Patience is not his (or my) strong point. So after 92 unanswered questions, he yells, "Momma, answer me right now!"

I had to hide my laughter. I had to look away as I explained how he needed to be respectful. I could not help but think about where he got his persistence from me. ME!!! Right now, I have so many questions and I feel like I am constantly asking God for answers. That day, Myers helped me see how much I still have to learn. Just like I only answer Myers when I know the time is right- God only answers our prayers in His perfect timing. I pray that I will have patience as I wait on the answers that will shape our future.

Tough Questions

8 months pregnant with Manning

If you live in Florence and have driven through the stoplight at the intersection of Irby and 2nd Loop, you have no doubt seen the sweet elderly couple that walks the sidewalk beside Hardees. They wear babydolls strapped to their chest, push strollers filled with life-like dolls, and carry signs that read,"Stop Abortion Now." I always smile and nod when I see them. I assume judging by the sheer number of carseats in my van they can see that I share their beliefs. I am not certain as to the effectiveness of their method, but at least they are doing SOMETHING!

8 months pregnant with Myers

Last week was like any other, however, this time my boys were with me and I know my boys. I see the couple, I hold my breath as we sit in the center lane. Maybe they won't notice them since there is another lane of cars separating us. No chance. From the very back seat I hear, "Momma, why are those people carrying baby dolls?" I take a deep "Help me, Jesus" sigh and in the most pre-school manner explained to my 3 and 4 year old what abortion is. They were silent in disbelief. As the light changed and we drove off, Manning questioned, "Momma, people do that in our world?"
I answered: "Yes, baby. They do it in our world and even in our town."
Again, my response was met with silence. They are so innocent. I hate exposing them to the sin in the world. However, I can't lie and hide the truth.
We continued towards home and I prayed they would move on to a new topic. Nope.
Manning comments: "I am glad you didn't do that [have an abortion.] Because I would be dead now."
I blinked back tears and responded, "Sweetheart, I would have Never done that. First of all, the Bibe tells us that abortion is murder and murder is ALWAYS wrong. Secondly, Daddy and I wanted you and your brothers with every ounce of our beings."
Myers finally speaks up, "When people die they go to heaven." Things keep getting deeper and I am beginning to wonder if I should have changed the subject when they started the questioning. Then Manning said something that made all the uneasiness of this conversation worthwhile, "I don't think people who have abortions have a Bible. I think we should give them all one." With gooscbumps, I answered,
"You are right. So very right."
Thank you, God, for these sweet boys and their understanding and desire for YOU. I pray that as they inevidently see more sin in this world, they will meet it with the same faith.

7 months pregnant with McCann

Two posts in one week....

God sure uses these little people in my world to teach me things. Myers turned 3 on April 14th and he is officially a "big boy." He demands independence and prefers to do everything himself. Kevin and I are learning to allow him to master the majority of things on his own. However, he still needs guidance. He needs our help and our supervison. 99% of the time he is willing to let us assist him. He brushes his teeth and then we help. He dresses himself and then we tie his shoes. Then there is the 1% of the time that he absolutely does not want our help. This tiny portion of time ALWAYS occurs in the car getting into his seat. He so badly wants to buckle himself into his carseat without any guidance from us. At three, he doesn't understand the ramfications of not being fastened correctly. We do and we want him to be as safe as possible. Enter 29 pounds of  fury. Legs kicking, arms swatting, screaming, yelling, crying. All just because we want what's best for him.
Today, as I battled the beast of  Myers and the carseat. God got my attention. "Amy, do you not act the exact same way in your own life?" I know I need God's direction and I know He is in control. He is the Alpha and Omega, beginning and end. He knows and wants what is best for me. I am completely aware of this and in most areas I readily relinquish control to Him. Then there are the other areas. The situations and issues in my life that I hold onto too tightly. The circumstances and things that are harder to give up, even when He is trying to give me His best. Isn't it amazing how God uses our children to reveal our own character, our own sin, and our own need for repentence? I pray that just as Myers learns the importance of allowing us to protect him, I will remember to allow God to protect me.

Do you know that feeling you get when your stomach is tied up in knots? When you are absolutely positive the cause is emotional, not physical. That queasiness that we associate with anticipation, anxiety, and excitement. I get it every single time I run a race. From the minute I get there- to the time the race begins. I get the same feeling every time I ride a roller coaster. Those endless minutes of standing in line watching, listening, and counting how many seconds the ride takes. (Does anyone else do this?) I  have probably experienced this feeling most intensely the nights before the births of each of my boys. That familiar tug that holds me in its grip. For a little while at least. Just as quickly as the uneasiness begins, it ends. The horn sounds and I feel freedom with each stride. The ride starts and I get lost in the thrill. The sweet babies enter the world and love overcomes.

The feeling itself is not comfortable but there is a peace in knowing the outcome. I have ran handfuls of races, ridden countless coasters, and birthed three boys. I know how this all  should work. I know that with the release comes the unknown terrain, the unexpected drops, and pain of new life. However, I know that in the end it will be worth it.. The pain and unfamiliar territory is replaced with satisfaction and relief. I cross the finish line in one piece (so far), the ride ends with me still on it (I always worry about falling out), and the doctors hand me a precious baby boy (Thank you, Jesus.)  Just as I know the trials that precede the joy, oh how I know the contentment once I am on the other side.

Right now in this journey of life, it would be incredibly easy to be in a constant state of anxiety. It is a daily decision to put those jitters aside. We are entering a whole new world, leaving behind familiar ground. Our house is on the market and we do not know what the next few months will bring. We don't know where we will live or where Kevin will work if we move. We do not know where the boys will go to school. The list of questions with no answers stretches as far as I can think. But just as I find hope in the knowledge that races, roller coasters, and child birth eventually come to an end. This period will too. Just as I cry out to God during that last mile when my mind is telling me to quit and that last push when I am begging for a c-section, I will call to Him again. I will have faith. I will trust in His plan and His provision. I am so thankful to serve a God who loves me and offers me perfect peace. Contentment in the here and now.

Whew...a busy April!

It's been so long since I've blogged it's hard to know where to begin. I have written at least five blogs in my head over the last few weeks. But things are busy. Days pass quickly with little time to sit down and collect my thoughts. Much less type them all out into coherent thoughts. Heck, these aren't even complete sentences. (Which absolutely drives the English teacher inside of me crazy.) However, since I have not actually taught 9th-12th grade Language Arts one single time since being certified I don't guess I should be too concerned. My preschoolers do not hold me to high standards when it comes to being grammatically correct.
We spent last week in Disney. 4, 2, and 1. Almost 5, almost 3, and just turned 1. The ages of our boys. I bet I said it 20 times in 4 days as people looked at our boys and asked how close they were in age. It was a wonderful, busy, tiresome week. The Hatchell family does not merely go to Disney. We attack it. We prepare for battle as we plan out each day, pack lunches, and conquer the crazy Mickey world with our tiny short army. We have this mentality that since we paid so much for this vacation, we MUST do everything. We must ride every ride, see every show, meet every character. We are "those" people in Disney World. Nevertheless, it was an absolute joy to see our boys dreams comes true. Wow, that sounds corny. It's true though. At 4 and 2, their biggest dreams were meeting Lightning McQueen and Buzz Lightyear. Score. I know they won't remember this trip. Kevin and I will though. Their excitement and joy was worth it all.

Life did not slow down when we returned home. Disney was a great preparation for the month of April for us. Manning, Myers, and Kevin are playing t-ball/softball right now. At different ball parks. 4 nights of the weeks are spent chasing McCann around a ball field cheering for my loves as they play their beloved sport.

Not only are my boys busy but I am running full speed ahead too. The runt of our litter (in stature, not age or ability) is having a birthday. Our Myers will be 3 on Sunday and we are celebrating with a "farmer" party on Saturday. This is all he wanted. All he would even consider. Farmer party or bust. So I am currently surrounded with farm animal decor praying for no rain as we have planned hay and pony rides. Craziness. To add it, I went from an all-time low of teaching 1 aerobics class a week the month of March to teaching 4 classes a week in April.  If that's not enough, couple it with the fact that it is VBS time. This is not an official time for anyone outside of me and my sweet co-director. However, for us the next 2 months will be spent meticulously planning VBS. Not because the job itself is so difficult, more so because of our perfectionist tendencies. Seriously, there are some things that are proven to bring people to the Lord. VBS is one of those. It teaches our children about Jesus, it glorifies our Father, and it promotes a fellowship among believers as we work toward a common goal. I believe in VBS and I want to work hard to make sure we are doing it the way God indeeds for it to be.  

"Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ." Colossians 3:23-24

Calvary Baptist Church will have our VBS June 24th-28th from 5:30-8:45pm. Please send your kids, tell your friends, and help us spread the word.

Every year

 Today and every year, I thank God for sending HIS son to pay the ultimate price and die for my sins. I am so grateful for a risen Savior.The sadness of Good Friday is replaced with the glorious promise of Easter Sunday. The resurrection of Christ gives us hope and a future.

As always, I remember this same morning 7 years ago. It was 1am, the room was dark, and my momma was taking her last breath. While on this earth, I will never again hear her voice, see her smile, or feel her warmth. Just as this brings great sadness, there is also joy. I know my precious momma is at Jesus' feet. She is partying with the King and there can be no greater place than heaven on Easter Sunday.

"He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed." 1 Peter 2:24

If you are not 100% sure that you will be in heaven with Jesus and my momma when you die. Please make it right. Say the prayer, invite Jesus into your heart, ask for forgiveness, and live for HIM. You can have confidence and assurance of where you will spend eternity. It burdens my heart that there are people all around me that may not be certain of their salvation. There is no better time than Good Friday to express your desire to His child.

Happy Birthday to my husband!

I am not overly romantic and I am certainly not the best at expressing gratitude to my husband. Sometimes I expect too much and thank too little. I take for granted all the ways he helps me, fathers our boys, and leads our family. This year,we decided to forgo Valentine and birthday gifts to save money for our upcoming Disney trip.

Tomorrow is Kevin's 42nd birthday and this is my present to him. A few lines thanking him for all he does and conveying how much he means to me. I am so thankful that God brought us together. So very thankful that our paths crossed. So very thankful that Kevin chose me to be his wife. Our three boys adore their daddy. They strive to be just like him. I pray they learn to treat their wives as Christ loved the church. They have a wonderful example because that's how their daddy loves me.

Many have asked me lately how I feel about all the upcoming changes in our lives. I always answer the same. There is never a time when I do not want to be right in the center of God's will. When I married my husband, I promised to follow him wherever the Lord led our family. Where Kevin goes in the name of Christ, I go too. That's the way it is.

 "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God." Ruth 1:16

Happy Birthday, Kevin! I love you and I am so incredibly proud to be your wife.

Around here and in heaven

As usual, things are busy around here. The beautiful weather has given us all spring fever. We went to the park this week (twice), rode bikes, lived outside. I could so deal with a constant 80 degrees. Everyday. Year round.
I am planning baby boy's first birthday bash. I cannot believe that sweet little guy is 2 weeks shy of 1. Pure craziness. He is growing so fast. Quickly leaving the baby stage. Heading full steam ahead into the toddler world. Just tonight I reached my hands down to pick him up and instead he gave me five. He is taking 4-5 steps alone trying so hard to walk like his big brothers. How do they go from teeny tiny infants to high-five-giving little kids in the blink of an eye?
The big boys are full of energy themselves. Myers' favorite thing to tell me is, "Mommy, look at me with your eyes." Whether I am doing some important (taking care of his baby brother) or not so much (playing on pinterest), Myers wants my undivided attention. It makes me giggle everytime he says it, but it also make me think. He deserves my attention. All of it as much possible. They all do. They need to know that no matter how many things I have to do, I always have time for them.
Manning is himself. Always asking questions. Big, deep, thought-provoking, mommy doesn't know the answer, questions. Just this morning he asked me, "What do we land on when we fall down in heaven?" I, of course, have absolutely no idea. He responds, "I think it is grass." Oh, yeah. You might be right. Why do you think that though? "Because no one cries there and it doesn't hurt when you fall on grass."

 "And I heard a loud voice from heaven saying, "Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they shall be His people. God Himself will be with them and be their God.  And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away." Revelation 21:3-4


When I think of heaven I can't help but think of my momma. She died right after my 24th birthday. She was sick for 6 1/2 years. From her diagnosis to the morning she passed away. She battled cancer one quarter of our time together. My most recent and vivid memories of her are watching her fight. Watching her struggle. Watching her suffer. And ultimately watching her die.
Therefore, it makes my heart so happy to think of her now. Whole. Healthy. No pain. No tears. I know she can't see the terrible things that happen on earth. I praise Jesus for heaven. A place of eternal joy separated from the ugliness and heartache that define our world. However, I pray that my momma can see my boys, can hear their laughter. I pray she got to hold them close before they were given to me. I pray she knows how grateful I am for her. I am the mother I am today beacause of her.

Be still

"Life is a Highway" is Manning's favorite song EVER.  It is hilarious to hear him sing it. Loud. Usually half the wrong words. Absolutely precious.
Today was Manning's day. I was flipping through radio channels as we drove home from school and his beloved tune came on. He was so excited! But during the entire first verse he pleaded with me to play it again when it went off this time. I tried to explain that we were listening to the radio not a CD; therefore, I could not replay the song. He reminded me that we do, indeed, have a CD with this song on it. I reminded him that we were almost at our house and we could listen to it later. It kept on. Finally, I said, "Manning, just enjoy it now."
He was missing out on enjoying his favorite song of all time (imagine a 4 year old's enthusiasm) simply because he was worrying about when he would get to hear it again. He was so focused on what was happening next that he couldn't appreciate the moment.
As soon as the words escaped my lips, I mentally froze. God had me in His grip. He (again) was using my babies to teach me. How many times do I waste opportunities today because I am too busy planning tomorrow?
We want to graduate college, we want to get married, then buy house, and have kids. It is the natural progression of life. But sometimes, I fear, we don't enjoy the right now enough because we are too busy "longing" for the next stage. Time flies. It seems like only yesterday we were bringing McCann home from the hospital. But that warm, February day was 11 months ago. My newborn is almost a toddler.
I am praying that this year I will be aware of capturing these days, holding onto my babies, being peaceful right where I am. It won't be like this for long. In a blink of an eye, our babies will be grown and we will miss these days of little sleep, constant loudness, and arguing siblings.
"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Psalm 46:10